Twas the night before an algo change and I’m at my house
My laptop is on and I’m clicking my mouse
My title tags are crafted from keywords with care
In hopes that the Googlebot soon would be there
My keyword density was optimized to the specs
While my homepage featured rich visible text
With ma pouring link juice and me in whitehat
I’d just uploaded a new Google site map.
When out on the web there arose such a clatter
I checked my page serve time to see what was the matter
Away to my toolbar I typed on a mission
Searched on my keywords and checked my position
My site pages were slipping – it must be a new algo
Page two, three, four and five, and some further below,
When, what to my site should suddenly crawl
But an indexer, a bot, spider, a combination of them all
Rolling across the web with a new algo so hot
I knew in a moment it must be Googlebot
More rapid than eagles the SEOs they came,
And he crawled, and indexed, and called them by name;
"Now, Fishkin! Matt Bailey! Jen Laycock and Bruce Clay
On, Ward! On Wall! Sullivan and Lippay!
To the top of organic! To the top of the paid!
Now dash away! Dash away! Your position could not have stayed."
As ranking that after Florida fell,
Welcome back, welcome back, it’s algo change hell.
So down to their laptops the SEOs they flew,
With more link bait and keywords and < H1 > tags too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard from the bay
The prancing and pawing of Larry and Sergey.
My PageRank was crashing and my AdSense had stalled
When down the chimney the Googlebot crawled
He said “I feel lucky” as he stepped from the fog
And his clothes were all tarnished with spim, spam and splogs
A bundle of inlinks he had flung on his back,
And they dripped out PageRank from inside of his sack.
His eyes how they indexed during this algo eve celebration
And he scanned the room as though looking for text navigation
He said “These alt tags are weak, your downtime is high
In truth it’s a wonder I even stopped by.”
”No index, no follow, just what are you hiding?
Logins, Flash movies?” he just kept on chiding.
I thought of buying up links, but should I take the chance?
Then I heard the music and knew, it was time for Google Dance
I wanted to go blackhat, but somehow resisted.
Then reading my mind, he said “You’ve just been delisted”
I asked if onsite changes would get me indexed again
He simply laughed and said “Do I look like MSN?”
He spoke not another word, but just started crawling
And all the while I saw my search rankings falling
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, my competitor’s rank rose
I asked “What I should do, is there no recourse?”
He simply said, “Try some AdWords, of course."
Then I heard him exclaim, as he finished indexing my site
"Do No evil to any, and to all a good-night."
